A very jealous man had to go on a long business trip and not trusting his wife went to a pet store to buy an intelligent parrot to spy on his wife. unfortunately the only parrot left was a legless one. Disgusted the man asked the shop owner, “What good is a parrot with no legs, how the hell can he see what is going on around him?” The man explained that the parrot actually held on to the perch by his penis and the fact that he had no legs actually increased his intelligence and asked the man to converse with the parrot.
After grilling the parrot for a good 15 minutes the man was amazed at the parrots intelligence and the clarity with which he expressed himself so he payed the $500 and took the parrot home. Just before he left for his business trip he instructed the parrot on how he wanted to spy on his wife and positioned the parrot so that he had a good view of the front door and the bedroom.
Two days later he came home and went straight to then parrot and once he got him alone he questioned him as to what occurred while he was gone.
“Well”, said the parrot, about five minutes after you left the doorbell rang and your wife answered it in her negligee, only to be met by a very well built man.”
“Yes,” said the man, “what happened then?”
“They closed the door and he took her into his arms and they kissed passionately,” said the parrot, pausing for effect.
“Yes, yes, and what happened then?”
“The man then takes off your wifes robes and starts to fondle her breasts….”
“Yes, yes,” said the man clearly getting exited, “go on, damn you, what happened then?”
“I don’t know” said the parrot, ” I cracked a stack and fell off the perch!”
I’ve got one for you that’s similar.
A guy goes into a pet store and says he’s looking for an entertaining pet. The owner brings him over to a parrot that can sing like Pavarotti. The guy is greatly impressed, buys the parrot, and goes home.
A couple of hours later the guy is back with the parrot, demanding his money back. When the owner asks what’s wrong, the guy says he’s been gyped because the owner didn’t tell him the parrot was missing his legs.
The owner tells the man he’s not getting his money back, saying “When you came in here you asked for entertainment and I gave you a singer. If you wanted a dancer, you should have said so.”
Mitch’s last blog post..Watch Out For Secret Shopper Scams
Not bad Mitch, but I like mine better. Could be because of the sexual inference 😆