Man, am I ever getting tired of getting all those crappy spam or scam emails, and to think that someone is making money out of it. The thing is that these emails are only targeting one particular scam or other. I mean what the hell is the point of sending a woman a pill to make her penis longer stronger and able to squirt more semen. And what sane man would want bigger breasts.
So I figured if I could come up with an email that would cover all the bases I would really rake in the money. After deep thought I came up with this baby.
To Whom It May Concern,
It is with great pleasure that I announce that we have managed to procure the resources of several large internet firms. This has allowed us to make huge savings and it is with great pleasure that we pass these savings onto you, our prized customers. Naturally, apart from the savings you can now do all your shopping in one place. Here are just a few of the things we have to offer.
Anatrim: For those of you who are finding it hard to shed some kilos, Anatrim could be your salvation. The proof is in the Oprah Show. You must have noted all the weight fluctuations that Oprah has had to put up with. Those times of weight increase was all due to her running out of Anatrim.
Viagra: Yes, if you have a problem getting it up we can supply the most potent form of Viagra on the market. If you flush this stuff down the toilet you may never get the seat down again.
VPXL Super Pill: Not satisfied with the length of your penis? Are you tired of women snickering behind your back? Do you want a member that will make a womans jaw drop in anticipation. Then VPXL is for you and we offer the best prices on the net.
Quality Watches: If you are looking for a quality watch, forget those replicas as we can get you the real deal! Rolex, Patek, Philippe, Roger Dubuis, Franck Muller, Cartier, IWC or Movado and all for the price of a replica!
Millionaire Transfers: Our site has a concise list of millionaires from all the remotest parts of the globe. With a few deft clicks we can set you up with the contact of you choice so that they can transfer the money to your account. Our management fee is a low $4.99 per transaction.
Lottery Marvel: Amongst our technicians we have one who has perfected a program that will help you to pick the winning numbers from the lottery of your choice. Read all the testimonials and you can see why at only $5 a time this had turned out to have the most return visitors than any other part of the site. Can you afford to miss out?
Spot On Dating Service: This has proved to be the most popular part of the website amongst singles and cheating wives and husbands. We offer a money back guarantee of either a wedding date or someone that puts out on the first day.
And now for the best of all. We understand how many of you dislike spam emails, so we have managed to put together the most comprehensive anti-spam site on the internet. For a one off $9.95 fee we will filter all your emails through our anti-spam email engine. It has proved to be 100% fool proof and once again we offer a money back guarantee.
So, what do you reckon? Worth a stumble or perhaps even a digg? Or at the very list it deserves a bloody comment!
I think you have all the spam bases covered so I thought I’d give you one of those bloody comments and I’m sorry, but I drank all the beer. Thanks for stopping by my blog.
Jude’s last blog post..PayPerPost Is Great Not Evil
Hey Jude, nice of you to return the visit. Don’t worry about the beer, I got plenty in the fridge.
Actually I thought you had a new product that would do everything – all in the one email!
I’m working on it mate. I will send you an email when it is all finished. :cheese1_ee: