All through my life there is one thing that I love above everything else, apart from sex that is, and that is a good joke. The one you are about to read may be a bit long winded but it is definitely worth persevering right to the end. This one has to be one of those typical Aussie jokes; As you would expect it happens at a pub and the action really starts after the two mates have downed a few beers.

Two builders (Phil and Eric) are seated either side of a table in a
rough pub when a well-dressed man enters, orders a beer and sits on a
stool at the bar. The two builders start to speculate about the
occupation of the suit.

Phil: – I reckon he’s an accountant.

Eric: – No way – he’s a stockbroker.

Phil: – He ain’t no stockbroker! A stockbroker wouldn’t come in here!
The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume of beer
gets the better of Phil and he makes for the toilet. On entering the toilet
he sees that the suit is standing at a urinal. Curiosity and the several
beers get the better of the builder.

Phil: – ‘Scuse me.. no offense meant, but me and me mate were
wondering what you do for a living?

Suit: – No offense taken! I’m a Logical Scientist by profession.

Phil: – Oh! What’s that then?

Suit: – I’ll try to explain by example… Do you have a goldfish at
home?

Phil: – Er… mmm . well yeah, I do as it happens!

Suit: – Well, it’s logical to follow that you keep it in a bowl or in
a pond. Which is it?

Phil: – It’s in a pond!

Suit: – Well then it’s reasonable to suppose that you have a large
garden then?

Phil: – As it happens, yes I have got a big garden!

Suit: – Well then it’s logical to assume that in this town if you have a
large garden then you have a large house?

Phil: – As it happens I’ve got a five-bedroom house…built it myself!

Suit: – Well given that you’ve built a five-bedroom house it is
logical to assume that you haven’t built it just for yourself and that you
are
quite probably married?

Phil: – Yes I am married, I live with my wife and three children.

Suit: – Well then it is logical to assume that you are sexually
active with your wife on a regular basis?

Phil:- Yep! Four nights a week!

Suit: – Well then it is logical to suggest that you do not masturbate
very often?

Phil: – Me? Never.

Suit: – Well there you are! That’s logical science at work!

Phil: – How’s that then?

Suit: – Well from finding out that you had a goldfish, I’ve told you
about your sex life!

Phil: – I see! That’s pretty impressive…thanks mate!

Both leave the toilet and Phil returns to his mate.

Eric: – I see the suit was in there. Did you ask him what he does?

Phil: – Yep! He’s a logical scientist!

Eric: – What’s that then?

Phil: – I’ll try and explain. Do you have a goldfish?

Eric: – Nope.

Phil: – Well then, you’re a wanker.

FYI: A wanker is a person who slaps the old salami, plays with himself, a person who masturbates. Also, in case you are wondering, that photo was taken inside some English pub.
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