Just Give Me A Damn Condom Will Ya!

Unfortunately there are some jokes that just aren’t the same unless you use the dreaded “F” word and this is one of them. So, if you are offended by the “F” word I suggest that you skip this post.

This young guy who was had his first ever hot date decided to go to a chemist to buy some condoms. The only problem was getting the courage up to ask the beautiful bird behind the counter for that packet of condoms. He finally gets up the courage and in a stammer asks her, “May I have a packet of c-c-c-c-c-c tweezers, yes, that’s it I need some tweezers!” She sells him the tweezers and then writes something down on the notepad.

Meanwhile the boy walks outside mentally chastising himself for being such a moron. He decides to try again and so he walks into the chemist, goes straight up to the counter and says. “May I have a packet of c-c-c-c-c straws! Yes I need a packet of straws please!” She sells him the straws and as he leaves the shop she writes something in her notebook again.

Meanwhile he is outside pacing and wondering why he can’t just buy a flipping packet of condoms. In a do or die effort he decides to give it one more try. Once again he boldly strides up to the counter, looks the pretty girl right in the eye and says, “Can I please have a packet of c-c-c-c! I really need a packet of c-c-c-condoms. That’s it! I need a packet of condoms!, he finally blurts out. The girls sells him the packet and after writing something in the notebook again she scratches her head and says, “Damn, that poor boy doesn’t know whether to pluck it, suck it or fuck it?”